Shadows
by Xeizihr
Summary: "I can't tell the shadows from the light..." - "Shadows", Aviators The ugly truth behind his existence he discovered after his struggle to find the light. Edward Grenore truly died when Add was born. (Oneshot)


He **_failed_**. He would never see or save his beloved mother ever again. He had attempted numerous times, all failures. He was all but innocent when he lost his parents. _**Innocent**_ , the damned word taunted him. That version of himself in that reality was happy. _Too happy._ He stood in the darkness of his laboratory. He wanted to see his mother so bad. To see her white lotus flowers again.

He missed home. But that seemed so far away, leaving him in all but the ashes of his past. His uncovered purple eye looked to the moon above from the broken part of his laboratory's ceiling. He would do anything to be happy, innocent, _pure_ again. He smiled a crooked smile. _**Home**_ , he would return there again. Even if he died.

His mind went on with calculations for a couple of minutes. It clicked but his satisfaction did not come. It was slightly higher of a chance. Add clawed at his head, frustration and lack of sleep clawing his mind to shreds. He ripped off his eyepatch.

45.7%

Tears fell from his eyes as he calculated the percentage rate again. The same, even after repeated steps and minor changes. It remained so low. He didn't care. Add silently commanded his dynamos to start charging up for a jump. It was moments later the fragmented purple portal formed before him. _**Again**_. He do it over and over until he returned to the past.

He stepped through the portal and was greeted with sunshine. Tears fell from his eyes as he saw _himself_ talking to his mother again. It wasn't his past, it was this _**damned**_ place! He left abruptly before anyone could see him. He attempted to the jump again, not caring about the consequences.

He did it over and over, all resulting with the same happy reality. He broke, allowing him to break down and cry finally. It was a year later after upgrading and training, he attempted again. "Why do I try?" Add mumbled to himself as he looked to the reflected portal.

He stepped in front of the portal, taking in his appearance for the first time in a year. Bright neon purple against seas of oily ink. His hair had grown to the point similar to the way he had it as a child. His clothes held no white, only black and purple. He looked menacing but he didn't care. The chains falling to his waist floated behind him as he began to float.

He took a deep breath and entered.

And he didn't care anymore. He became a beast within human skin. In a fit of rage, he destroyed it all. The happy, _twisted_ reality of his family living all so happy was _**gone**_. He destroyed everything when he returned. His laboratory then Velder. He smiled at the pitiful fight the guards had put up along with the demons. All so _damn **pitiful**_. It made him feel satisfied finally.

 _Monster. Demon. Diabolic Esper. King of Time and Space. God of Time._

He loved their fear. Their ridiculous, pathetic existence wasn't worth anything to him. Add wanted more destruction. He was about to go to Hamel next in guise of a traveler. He was stopped by him.

He didn't look like a nuisance, more of a threat when he saw him. The man wore a partially broken metal mask with completely usable eyehole. Add hadn't felt fear since before his transformation into the Diabolic Esper. His defeat was swift and painful. Add hit the ground with a crack. He looked at the man standing at the edge into the crater Add had formed when landing.

"Someone's been _**naughty**_." His voice was mocking. Add coughed, his black tar-like blood leaving his mouth. _**No!**_ He couldn't be defeated this easily! The _Diabolic Esper_ attempted to push himself up. But a kick on the back made him scream from the pain of his injuries. "You are only human, or rather was." This man was correct in a way.

He gave up his human emotion to become the monster he currently was. The man picked Add's limp form up into a bridal style. Add wanted to fight the man but he was feeling _tired_. "Little Child—" His eyes fluttered closed for a brief second. "—I understand your pain. Also, stay awake. It would be nice if you didn't fall into a comatose state." What? Add knew he was dying, his fighter was made sure to put him on death's doors. He wasn't going into a coma.

The man holding him shook Add so he would stay awake. He would die a monster, he was one from the start. His father created him to be one and Add became the mass weapon of destruction like his father wanted. He closed his eyes for one last time and opened them to see blue.

He pushed himself up, seeing the man who defeated him before him by a few meters. "Welcome to Hell, _Diabolic Esper_ , Add." The man's single golden eye smiled. "Our mistress hopes you little the next _indefinite eternity_ here."

He couldn't see the light anymore. He hadn't been able to for awhile he realized now. He knew the ugly truth behind his existence.

 _To forever be a slave._


End file.
